April Fool’s 2026 – A Tradition We Wish to Carry On

A series of incredible news today with:

• European Union and Commission adopt pure European software
• Amazon decided to stop S3 immediately
• Microsoft wishes to promote (again) FAT12
• 10PB tape is ready
• Seagate, WD and Toshiba finally merge
• 1PB HDD arrived this summer and finally fill the gap with 1PB SSD but we heard that 10PB SSD are ready as well
• NAND flash vendors just decided to launch HDD
• Only valid today, 1PB SSD at $1,000 !!
• DNA storage is ready and faster than NAND
• French nuclear technology is adopted worldwide
• Thor Deadlifts GTC, Vdura GPU Storage Optimized Airborne, Signaling Space Data Centers Next
• Mars data centers will enter in production next Monday
• StorPool buys Antropic and OpenAI in a $5 trillion deal
• DDN brings a fully working AI Factory on a bus: GPU‑powered demos rolling to you
• Storware Ransomware Negotiation-as-a-Service: for excitement when recovery is just too easy
• New Open-E JovianDSS HA Cluster extension: ‘Emotional Support Node’ to remind all’s going to be fine
• JuiceFS supports 500,000,000,000 files in a single volume, not kidding
• Coldago buys Gartner

As you can imagine, all of the statements above are simply April Fools’ inputs we gather from the market, an opportunity that comes around only on this day. Thank you for your attention.